Quick Catch Up & Happy Easter!

Well, hello! It’s been a crazy long time since I’ve written and for no other reason that I’ve been crazy busy! How are all of you? I hope you are doing well and enjoying the changing of the seasons! Spring is here and in full bloom :) Aidan has been working on the yard and getting it to look nice so that makes me super happy!

Tomorrow is Easter and I am hosting a small brunch. Yay! Up until about 5 years ago I hosted Easter brunch every year and I am really excited to be doing it again. There will only be like 5 people coming (as opposed to the old 20 count) but I am making a ton of food for them! I hope it will turn out well ;)

My store has really started taking off and it was really a great move to partner up with the clock guy I met through my work. He mostly has clock parts for me to sell for him but he also has a really good eye and finds some really neat stuff. It all sells well too and I am making money :)

Check out these antique tea cups! Some are listed and the others will be going live soon!

Aren’t they just amazing? I would love to have all of these to use in an office and I really can’t decide which is my favorite. They really are works of art and super extravagant!

I met my first goal of $1,000 in sales March and now I am nearing the $2,000 mark, it’s a really good feeling. My new goal that I am working towards is $1,000 in profit and I am pretty sure I have hit that already :) So I need some new goals! I have quite a few in mind :)

Aside from partnering up and making sales I’ve been finding some really cool stuff! The great thing about all of this is that I can buy all the things I love or that I want and then I keep them for a little while and enjoy them while they wait for their new home!

My inventory system needs a little (or a lot) of tweaking but for the most part I am pretty organized and (kind of) clutter free. My system is a bit chaotic as I am learning but it is finding a natural flow. I will need to figure a better system out soon though because if things keep going at this rate I will be upgrading my store to hold 2,000 listings a month. Right now I am at the 500 listings a month and half way through I am worried I am running out of listings. Like I said, goals in mind..

Well, I had to take Regina to work and now I have to get some housework done. I hope you all have a great holiday and I will try to write more soon!


A little pissed off right now

Let me tell you something..

I may be a little blazae blah with all my spelling and my grammar but whatever i am real. with right, with what I write and how i feel and i’m not perfect but that was a big flaw with me.. perfectionism.

it made me stop.

i am not stopping now and maybe i don’t have the readership, or the stats, or the conformity, but i think “well, whatever.”

the truth is this. he doesn’t believe in me.

All this time. all these years, he doesnt know jack shit about me or who i am or who i can be.

my ex knew and he was afraid of it

he knows and is doubtful.

too much of a risk?

come on.

what risk

a little here and there

and Nan, really?

fuck you both

it’s not about 85$

85 fucking dollars

it’s about the belief in me that i thought you both had

it’s the belief in me that you clearly do not

so fuck you both.


Thonet, okay!

With all the emotional chaos that has been going on with my mom I’ve been dealing by focusing A LOT on the house. And by focusing on the house I don’t mean cleaning it like a maniac for once. I’m actually creating a lot of work as far as cleaning goes but that’s not really much to talk about except to say I have A LOT of cleaning to catch up on. Or re-organizing and putting things away.

What I’ve been doing is adding and updating furniture. I’ve been called a hoarder by Aidan, Regina and even Marshal (over the phone). I’m not hoarding though, they are teasing me. But if I don’t stop soon I might be considered a hoarder, lol. Just kidding.

Anyway. I’ve been having really, super awesome luck on craigslist and have found quite a few deals of a lifetime. Seriously. I don’t know when exactly it all started. It was either with the coffee table I inherited from my parents that turned the switch on or seeing a gorgeous mid-century modern bookshelf on a random blog that I HAD to have. Which came first? I do not know.

Anyhow — after seeing the bookshelf I started searching craigslist for one and came upon item after glorious item of things that I needed. Ha! I’ve been a long time looker on cl but never actually used it to buy or sell anything. Now I’m a full blown addict.

I like to think I have a good eye. I say this because I have found deals on items that can be found selling for thousands.

Case one:

Thonet bentwood lounge chairs


When I first saw the picture of these chairs my heart skipped a beat. Not because I knew their worth, but because I thought they were just so awesome to look at. The way the armrest curves and the back legs poke out.. Oh my, I fell in love. I had never even heard of Thonet before but really really wanted one of these chairs.

I did a little research and found that these chairs as a pair sell for a pretty penny. On not just one site, but two. A supplier for designers sells them to clients and 1st dibs, a site for high quality vintage furniture (probably other stuff also) each had one set of two of the same exact chair selling for $3,000+. Seriously. My love grew deeper.

So I obsessed for a few days, talked to everyone in the world about the chairs and finally decided to contact the seller. She turned out to be a really nice lady!

Regina and I took the boys on a little road trip to pick out a chair that made my heart pitter patter. When I got there I talked to the seller for a little bit while picking out the chair I wanted.

And then guess what happened?!

She said I could have two of them for the price of one! She could see how much I loved them and it was obvious I wasn’t a flipper. Also she wanted to free up space! Seriously, I almost hugged her. For real. Would that have been weird? Probably. So I didn’t. But I wanted to.

Before I left I told her that I had never CL’d before and she replied by saying “It’s the best!” Man oh man was she right! This is just my first story of six!

These chairs make me smile every time I see them.

People who know the story ask me why I don’t resell them. The truth is.. I LOVE them.

Eventually we will get them refinished with some nice leather and have the wood restored when we know where they will sit in our new home. Am I going to lessen the value? I don’t know, they are considered vintage not antique. The lines are just fantastic so I plan on keeping them anyway. Having them updated by a professional will increase the value for us, so that’s what matters in the end.

Well that’s the story of how I got hooked on craigslist furniture and there are some more super awesome scores to write about another day.

Have you ever bought/sold on craigslist and felt like a total winner? Spill the beans :)


Time to myself

Regina came home from California yesterday morning and I was so happy to see her. She looked so glamorous getting out of the Uber car dropping her off. Her long black hair in a top knot, her sunglasses on, a really nice California hoodie and shorts and sandals. I can’t believe she is so grown up. She said she had fun on the trip but didn’t get to go into LA. I know she was disappointed about that but she did a lot of other cool things and had fun anyway.

As she was telling me about her trip and the castle they visited (a famous one half in a mountain over looking the beach — the name I forget) her eyes were lit up with amazement while telling me the castles past. Her expressions were of amazement and I just felt so happy that she was able to experience such a wondrous monument and really appreciate the experience.

After her being here for about 45 minutes her girlfriends came over and whisked her away. Aidan took the boys to his parents house for a visit and I got very drunk and cleaned. I love cleaning alone. It’s such a weird thing to love but I was able to clean our room and the boys room, start some laundry, and drink, drink, drink way too much.

I called my mom and we chatted. Why not be lit when talking to her, right? She is denying her drinking problem and avoiding calling a doctor that she was referred to about a spot that was found on her liver during a CT scan. She also has to go to a neurologist but didn’t hesitate to make that appointment. She is going to NYC next weekend with my dad to see a play but when she gets home she promised to make the appointment. I am very much like my mom and I am upset with myself for the drinking I did yesterday. I’m not beating myself up or anything but I know I have it in me to become like her so I need to just not drink. Really.

Aidan was happy when he arrived home and found that I didn’t start any projects. He said he was worried about what he might have found when he got back here. He asked me not to tear any walls down and I gave him my word though, so instead of doing exciting demolition after cleaning I painted my finger and toe nails. :) And then passed out on the couch in a drunken stuppor while watching an episode of Devious Maids.

After I sobered up we took the boys to see fireworks in a nearby town. They were supposed to start at dusk but they didn’t until almost 10pm. That was late for the babies but they didn’t get fussy or cranky. Maddox actually fell asleep on my lap in the middle of the show. Yep, he slept through loud ass fireworks. LOL

Well, the boys are up, have a great day!

All that can happen in 4 months..

Well, well, well. Here I am writing for the first time in 4 months. Four. Actually there was one drunken post at one point but then I removed it because it was just crappy nonsense. To say that things have been busy around here would be true and to say they’ve been crazy would be even more truthful. Honestly, I feel like there isn’t time for anything other than living right now and my nerves have been shot but might be starting to settle down soon. Maybe.

Marshall is away at a residential treatment facility. He will be there for about a year and should help him a lot. This was court ordered by a very nice judge who probably saw the desperation in my eyes when I requested he be placed. As you know I love all of my kids more than anything and I had been wanting him to be sent somewhere for a while for his own good, as well as for ours. He and Aidan had it out one night and it got really, really bad. I had Regina call the police because Marshal was seriously out of his head attacking Aidan. It was scary. That was in February and he hasn’t been home since.

If I am lucky and can get back into the swing of things I will talk more about Marshal in later posts.

I really miss writing so much.

Regina is another stressor.. Her graduation is next Thursday and she is scrambiling at the last minute to get her work done so she can actually graduate. Why she does this I just don’t know. She’s failing cosmetology because of her attendance. She’s months and months behind on her on-line courses. She’s playing hardball with her head in the clouds. Do I think she’ll get it all done in time to participate in graduation? Yes. I’m I worried sick that I’m wrong and she won’t? Yes. It’s her life and I can’t do it for her. All I can do (and do daily) is nag. Fun for all.

On top of those two my mother has been very odd and apparently has/had begun drinking around the clock. I don’t even know what to write about her other than I am worried. I think she is going through some mental health issues and trying to self medicate with more alcohol than usual. Trying to help my dad and brother help her has been difficult because I am so far away, have two little boys that I don’t want to bring around her and also I have to do a few driving trips each day to get or drop off Regina at work or school or what have you. I’ve also honestly have been hoping my mom gets her head out of her ass and gets her shit together. Not realistic.

The little boys keep my days busy. Maddox is starting to walk now and has been getting into everything for a while now. Logan has been getting jealous and they both constantly want my attention to be directed at themselves. It’s rough, it’s normal and I’m blessed to be able to be home with them. They drive me crazy though. :)

My mentalĀ  state hasn’t been so hot but I know it’s because of everything that’s going on. I feel stretched thin but it will all fall into place. My medication was switched and it’s taking it’s time working. I have gained 20 pounds since starting the first med and it’s making me miserable. This new med that replaced it though should help me lose that weight. I hope so though because I really feel disgusting. It’s terrible. Especially concidering that I had lost so much weight after having Maddox, who will be a year old next month.

Logan’s 3rd birthday is on Thursday. Since the boys birthdays are so close together I am having a combined party. I don’t want to do all of the work twice and we are far enough away from family that one trip is good for them to make instead of two.

In August Regina will be 18. Holy fucking shit batman. I would be close to the end of child hood! But that’s not the case at all. I’ve got another 17 years before I can say that. Sigh. I love the kids, each and every one of them but this Mama is tired. Really tired. I turned 38 on Friday. My life is chugging along and of my whole life I’ll have had 35 years of kids under 18. If that doesn’t keep you young then I’m fucked.

I’ve been working on the stairwell and woodwork in the house and it’s been moving quickly. I’ll update more soon, Logan just woke up.

Avoiding the monster kitchen by writing

Freezer cooking round one — check!

Yesterday I finished cooking up the chicken breasts that were marinading in the fridge. These too are for the freezer but I used a few for dinner last night as sandwiches and they were a crowd-pleaser.

There are a few more pasta recipes and casseroles that I want to make for the freezer also but guess what.. I don’t have any room left in there! That thing is filled to the brim. It’s a nice feeling but also aggravating when trying to get something in or out.

Marshal and a school update..

Yesterday was a follow up for Marshal’s truancy court. He still isn’t in a smaller school and the judge was pretty fierce about the school dragging their feet. In all fairness to the school winter break happened so that took a week and a half away for them but it has been a month so I’m glad that the fire was lit. I’m super happy actually. So was Marshal. I’ve not seen him smile that hard since Christmas and before that his birthday.

I love him so much and just want him to be happy and get a high school diploma. And not go to jail. Or be bad. Or not have a hard time socially. Okay, well you get the point. Anyway I think he will feel better around kids who have struggles the same as him and hopefully it will work out for the best.

The stupid dirty kitchen..

Today I’ve gotta deep clean the kitchen. Again. Always.

All the cooking I did left a film of grease on the counters and floor by the stove and it’s gross (and dangerous). I feel like most of the time spent cleaning and deep cleaning is done in the kitchen and I am getting sick of it. If we had a hood vent it wouldn’t be half as hard. Of course it would be one more mess to clean so I should stop wishing my chores away :)

1.4 Billion Dollars..

How about that lottery? I know it’s on everyone’s mind, a least a little bit! I really hope we win. Like, really hope it. I know what the odds are but like I’ve said here before I tend to get things that have really high odds. Aidan reminded me they were all bad things to have really high odds on but I think winning the lottery would even it all out.

I can’t even begin to imagine what would happen if we won that kind of money. Or any money really. But a BILLION dollars? Seriously, I have no idea what I would do. Aidan has a few ideas that I don’t necessarily agree with. I told him we’d split it to prevent trouble. Then we’d join most of it, to prevent trouble :)

I did tell Marshal that I would take him and Regina on a vacation, just the three of us, to somewhere like Hawaii or something. That would be so awesome. We’d have a blast and it would be great for the three of us to just hang out like the old days before Aidan and the babies were here. I love having Aidan and the babies, I wouldn’t change it for a second, but it would be fun to just be the three of us again for a week or two.

The only two things after that thought would be paying off bills and planning a beautiful wedding. I’d want to invest and take care of my family and start some kind of non-profit for either at risk youth or domestic violence victims but all of those would take a lot of thought, research and a team of people.

Oh my gosh — can you even imagine? Being a mega millionaire (after taxes)? From having a plain struggle working class life to not having to worry about how to pay your bills and afford extras ever again? What would you do if you won this 1.4 billion jackpot?


“She just randomly tears the house apart..”


Regina: Mom, what are you doing?
Me: Trying to get this damn screw out!

Regina: Why?
Me: I’m taking the fireplace out.

Regina: Ohh..

Regina’s friend: You’re taking it out or putting it in?
Me: Out

Regina’s friend: Wait, the fireplace.. You’re putting it in or taking it out?
Me: I’m trying to take it out.

Regina to friend: My mom is weird. She just randomly tears the house apart. You never know what she is doing. One day we woke up to a wall missing.

Me: Well, I never used this and I hate it and I found out yesterday it was ventless so I can just take it out but this fucking screw won’t turn.

Regina’s friend looked puzzled but it’s true. When shit around here bothers me enough and after some thinking and investigating I tend to jump right into a project.

We’ve been talking about removing this stupid gas fireplace (that I’ve not used once in 11 years) for quite a while and it suddenly occurred to me that it might be one of those ventless ones everyone is warned about using.

Before just ripping it out though I went up into the attic to find the instruction manual the old owners kindly left for me when I closed on the house. Hurrah for organized homeowners :)

Sure enough this stupid thing is ventless. Sure enough I want it out of here as of 11 years ago. So I tried to remove it. But I failed and before I decided to go hardcore I stopped because it is connected to a gas pipe coming up from the basement. Aidan needs to help me with this. Tomorrow.

I can’t wait to see what is behind this stupid fireplace. Peeking into the huge gaps that weren’t ever sealed up when the previous people installed it I can see the exposed brick of the exterior wall. This tells me that the wall itself is original but honestly the mantel doesn’t make sense and the stack for the actual unused chimney is only about 1’6″ wide so why they would build a four foot wall around it is beyond me.

In any case.. Now that Aidan finished painting the room I plan on tearing the fireplace out and the wall down.

He loves me.

I’ll tell you what.. Once we do that we will have about 5ftx2ft more space in the room. Also, I want to take out the closet which is not original to the house. The problem with that though is that I need a coat closet down here. It’s where we keep the coats. And the vacuum.

Anyway .. I need the fireplace out this weekend and then we will go from there.