I don’t know how to help my mother

Okay, there is a lot to write about. A LOT. I can’t connect everything into one post so I guess I will start with the worst of it and then I’ll show you what my living room looks like in another post?!

My mother. My mom. About 6 months ago my brother started noticing that she was beginning to act a little differently, I even told Aidan that she was the happiest I had ever known her to be in all my life. It was nice to have her happy, cheerful and excited for life.

She was having issues with her potassium levels and once prescribed potassium she began to feel incredible. She was full of energy, had lost a ton of weight and was feeling more capable than ever to live an energetic and positive life. She joined a gym and started to clean out her house. She was happy to be around her family and friends.

Little by little her mood and energy began to drop. She would blame it on her potassium levels and then began to drink more alcohol. Over a few months her craziness started to make us wonder what was going on. I thought she may be bipolar, my brother thought it was the beginning of Alzheimer’s, most of the time everyone including me thought she was a full blown raging drunk. She was getting lost frequently, for hours at a time, driving very far and not knowing how she got to where she was. Siri became her friend and she spoke of the electronic helper on her iphone as if it were a real person. I thought she was being funny about it but now I wonder if she really thinks it is a person..

She’s been falling all over the place, cursing everyone out, family, doctors, strangers on the phone. Her favorite thing to say is “You’re a fucking douche bag” to anyone who offends her or annoys her. She’s cursed out close friends at their parties, the cops have been called on her at doctors offices and she blames this all on potassium but sees nothing wrong with her behavior.

Last week I got a message from my brother that my mom went missing again. She had left the house without her purse or phone and told my dad and brother that she was going to the doctors. She didn’t have an appointment and after she hadn’t returned for 4 hours my dad began to get really worried. This was the second time in as many days that she disappeared without her phone but this time she was driving.

He called the police and they put out a national missing persons alert, knowing that her mental state has been what it should be. About 15 minutes later my dad got the call that firemen found her about 3 hours from the house. She was parked in a middle lane of a divided highway, facing the wrong direction. Think about that. Parked on a highway . Facing the wrong way.

She was taken to the hospital and was completely disoriented. She had NO idea what was going on.

Aidan drove my dad up to her the next morning and said she was completely out of it. She thought she was near our house. She thought she was in New York. She didn’t remember the trip to NYC she had just taken with my dad a few days before (where she also got lost).

She stayed there for a full day and some hours before my dad brought her home AGAINST MEDICAL ADVICE and without a diagnoses of any kind. She cussed me out on the phone when I told her I wanted to go to the neurologist appointment with her, told me she loved me and wished me a long and happy life before hanging up on me when I told her this has nothing to do with her potassium.

My dad is frozen. Ignoring it all, still buying whiskey, not making her doctors appointments and not grasping what is going on. I know that he has always depended on her for everything and that this is really hard for him. He’s not being neglectful on purpose, he just wants his wife of 40 years to be herself and doesn’t know what to do.

My mom is out of her mind. There are many stories of the craziness she has been pulling this week alone and maybe I’ll talk about them another time but this post is already getting long.

I’m worried about my mom and don’t know how to help. Today I am going to call the police and ask them to do a welfare check if she is still acting like she was yesterday. She needs medical help and she is putting herself and others at risk at this time. My dad will probably be mad but relieved. I don’t know what he will be, I don’t know what he is doing.

So yeah. That’s the newest bad issue I am facing. It’s always something, right?

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2 thoughts on “I don’t know how to help my mother

    1. Thanks, she’s back in the hospital, I’m heading down to talk to the doctors in a little bit. I hope they will talk with me and I hope they can help. I’ll write more, this was another very bad situation :(

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