American Kid

Yesterday went okay. Marshal was upset with me at the probation meeting because I was honest about him not listening to me at home and about my concern for him and all of the weed he smokes. He kept saying that I just want him placed out of our home and all I could say was that I want him to be safe.

In my opinion the police are treating him as public enemy number one and I know that is a bit dramatic but they don’t care for him and want to catch him doing anything at this point. He doesn’t realize what a dangerous position that puts him in, especially when he tends to panic and run. Sigh.

The intake officer was nice enough and explained to him that only in the very worst case scenarios will they remove him from the home. I wish he would understand that I only want the best for him, better for him than he has been giving himself lately. He will need to go to court because this is the second time he’s been arrested and will likely be put on probation again. That’s a good thing because it will keep him in the mindset that he can’t get into trouble. It’ll give him some time to cool out and hopefully get the cops off his back.

I think we will end up with family therapy again. That really is a pain but honestly it really does help so much. It’s hard to admit that our life is so difficult and not just a regular do what you need to do and get on with life ordeal. It’s hard to admit that we are messed up but I’m not one to ignore that and I try so hard to get everything moving in the right direction. I just want these kids to be okay and not filled with hate for what they went through in their childhood for the rest of their lives.

I keep hearing that song American Kids by Kenny Chesney in my mind. That’s how I feel about my life, I hope when the kids are my age they will feel the same.



More on Marshal

Two days in a row? Yes, sir :) Before I get all super proud of myself or you think I woke up early I’ll let you know that I did not. I got up in enough time to wake Regina up, make her lunch and get her coffee ready to go. The difference today is that I don’t need to wake Marshal up and Aidan isn’t rushing out the door.

Marshal has a meeting at the probation office to find out what will happen from the trouble he got into back in December when he was accused of having a gun (he didn’t) and then ran from the police.

Things never seem to go smoothly all at once around here. Either the big kids are doing well at home and horrible in school or doing well in school but horrible in the neighborhood.

As of now, Marshal has seemed to adjusted well to being placed in special education classes. At home though he is breaking all my rules and disrespecting just about everything I say. Case in point: smoking cigarettes and weed — in my house. As if it’s not bad enough and the main cause of my stress already now he is sneaking it in his room and then blatantly lying about it to my face, despite me being very clear and firm that I won’t allow it.

Also, he had another run in with the law. Apparently his friends foster brother filed a false report but didn’t admit to it until Marshal was in police custody. Once again before the police had him in their custody Marshal tried to run. He surrendered in the long run but he is seriously an idiot and worse he just doesn’t get it.

I don’t know what to do about this kid. Like seriously, have no idea. When we go to the intake meeting I am going to tell the person everything and see what they can do to help. He needs restrictions obviously and the ones I impose he just turns his cheek to. I’m sure at the very least he will have probation for 6 months. This will be good for drug testing and curfew, maybe even therapy. It’ll buy me another 6 months of not constantly worrying each time he walks out the door.

I’m hoping for the school placement I talked about a while ago but I won’t hold my breath. I’ll push for it though.

Well, have a nice day. Wish me luck :)

What’s the story morning glory?

I’ve gone from posting once a day to now once a week every TWO weeks. Ugh. Time is flying at least, right? I started this last week.. Yup.

I don’t understand what the struggle is about waking up early anymore. I mean I really go to bed at 8 or 9 every night and still hit snooze two times to many in the morning.

Oh, I know! It’s because Maddox has been nursing a lot more at night. He has more teeth coming in so he wakes up more often. Poor guy. Poor Mama.

The past (two) weeks was (were) okay (kind of). We ordered Maddox’s convertible car seat because he outgrew the infant carrier. We got the same brand as the carrier and the convertible one that Logan uses, Evenflo. Most of the convertibles are around $300 but we got this one for $180 on Amazon and we know that we like it because like I said Logan has one.

When I pulled it out it looked huge and I couldn’t imagine that Maddox’s head would even reach the head rest on the lowest setting that it adjusts to. Seriously? I put him in it though before throwing a hissy fit and holy cow my kid is a giant!


Is it just me.. He’s adorable right? I know as the mama I am supposed to think he’s the cutest, but really — he is a cutie to the rest of the world, too, right?

Aside from being very big and cute (19 pounds and I forget how many inches) Maddox is very strong. He’s about to start crawling and can sit himself up pretty well. Not entirely by himself but almost! He sat up all by himself twice this week!! And he gets arounf the room in an army crawl like nobody’s business.

Here he is in his bouncy seat refusing to take a nap:



He is a fussy guy and whines quite a lot. He gets really mad when he wants to play with something that he isn’t allowed to have (specifically electronics) and squeals like a pig. Yes, a pig. I predict “Babe” being his favorite movie or another one with pigs. I should read Charlotte’s Web to them. Really, that would be a good one to read, it’s on my list.

Better you than me, sister!

In other baby news, I think that I mentioned my niece and my sister-in-law are both pregnant with their seconds? Well, I’ve been successfully getting stuff together for my niece and have another batch of items for her. Luckily she is having a boy and probably won’t need anything other than things she wants.

On Saturday we went to Aidan’s parents for his Dad’s birthday. It was a nice get together and my sister-in-law was there and is now 7-8 months pregnant. She looks adorable but extremely miserable. I felt sad for a second knowing that I will never be pregnant again but that only lasted a second because pregnancy sucks. I feel bad for her and how uncomfortable she must feel. They aren’t finding out what the baby is. I have no guesses either. If I had to choose I’d say a boy because her belly looks like mine did but I don’t know that it’s an indication of anything.

 Things that broke..

Well, we have now officially updated every single major appliance in the house. Every single one.. The furnace, water heater, washer dryer, refrigerator, dishwasher and most recently the stove.

Let me tell you about the stove.. For whatever reason when I bought the house it had an apartment sized stove in it. Really it was unnessecary because my kitchen really isn’t that small and a normal sized one could fit, but anyway it came with a 20″ stove and over the years I learned to love it. It was a work horse. Seriously, I cooked and baked in and on that stove so much and our relationship grew over 11 years. It was a piece of shit that didn’t work right, but I figured out it’s quirks and I agreed to not cuss it out everyday if it would just help out a little.

So.. That agreement worked for 11 years but finally the little stove that could finally called it quits and just couldn’t anymore.


Why, yes! That is a stool propping the door closed! I tried to work with it as best I could but it just turned rediculous. I had to keep the door propped but the stool kept getting knocked into which meant the door would fall, not just open but just about off.

I was really hoping it would keep together until we could afford to replace the cabinets and counters but that didn’t work out.

Aside from the little stoves being super small, they aren’t very popular so no major companies make them. They are hard to find and very pricy. I could have gotten a regular sized stove (LG at that) for a lower price than what we bought. It would have been more costly to buy the cheaper stove and replace everything else though, so it was what it was..

We had to replace the tiny stove with another tiny stove..


Please don’t mind the kitchen. It was (is always) a hot mess.

So there is our tiny new stove that seems to have as many problems as the old one. The door stays closed though. I guess that is good? We had to call the place we bought it from because of course one of the burners doesn’t light. None of them light easily but the one has a broken piece.

Will I learn to love this stove? Probably. But damn I really just want new cabinets, counters and a backsplash. And a new floor. And a billion dollars. And a maid who will just clean the kitchen. And maybe the bathrooms..

There is so much more to write about but the littles are awake. I really need to rethink my schedule and find a better time to write since the mornings obviously aren’t working for me anymore..

I hope you are all well!!