Yesterday was a bust. A big ol’ bust. I didn’t get anything done. I was so tired that all I could get done was thinking about what I wanted to do. I guess that happens.
We ate leftovers. I didn’t shower. No cookies were made. No bathrooms were scrubbed. The kids were though.
I woke up this morning to a huge mess in the kitchen. One that I did not make but now one that I will clean up because if I wait until the kids wake up it won’t be until after noon.
The real kicker about yesterday is that I didn’t even really relax. I didn’t watch any tv or get a good nap. I just thought and walked around like a zombie. Stupid day.
I’ve been writing on this blog for over a year now. I got my anniversary notification over a week ago. I had to look back into my posts to find the date: December 14th. Since then I’ve written 270 posts, not including this one.
That’s great for me!
On my old blog, which was more successful (in terms of readership) I had posted 248 times from December 4th 2010 – January 26th 2014. Over here I’ve written way more posts in way less time.
Loss of laughter?
My old blog was better in terms of content and editing I suppose. I used to edit the shit out of what I was posting. I had to leave that behind but couldn’t delete it though. When I sometimes look back at that blog I realize that I was pretty funny.
Sometimes I think I am a little funny here but over there it was easier to make fun of myself and the bad luck streak I was stuck in. I must have come across funnier over there too because I think my humor here is often missed.
That leads me to think I have lost my sense of humor quite a bit over the years. Life has hardened me in ways that I don’t even realize. Don’t get me wrong, I still have fun in me, I’m just not like I used to be. I want to be sarcastic and goofy still but it feels like I sometimes don’t know how.
I think sarcasm served as a defense mechanism for me through a tough life and bad times, but I miss that about myself. Not the tough part — which we all know isn’t completely gone — but I want to try harder to be fun again.
I think I am still quite funny but it doesn’t seem that many of you either get me or think that I am funny. Sylvia gets my humor. I wonder if anyone else does? I wonder if you all just think I am just a huge complainer? I try to make light of my complaints.
I mean seriously..
I don’t know why I care so much for making people laugh or chuckle at least. When I was in the 6th grade I was voted the class clown and have always enjoyed making light of situations. And being sarcastic. Now I probably just seem dark and cranky.
I am cranky but I am a mom of four.
Poor Aidan. He’s known me forever and as a total goofball. Now I’m serious all the time. Well, more often than I used to be.
Okay so now that I’ve complained about being funny and the mess in the kitchen I guess I better go laugh my way through cleaning. Man, I always wished I had magical genie powers. I still sometimes put my arms on top of one another, nod my head and blink hoping they will finally kick in. True story.