Call Me Madame Zola

This morning it was difficult to get up again but coming down to a clean kitchen made me happy. Yup, I cleaned it again before bed last night, woohoo! Two days in a row, is it a habit yet? Not even close, but closer at least! I have my wash going and even though I said one load a day I did two yesterday and maybe I’ll do two today, just because I am not caught up since the weekend.

Once again the boy slept through his alarm. Now he is in his room cursing and banging things for who knows what reason. He’s a real peach in the morning. Their bus comes in 5 minutes and they both had a terrible time getting up and moving today. It was expected. Four minutes. They better not miss that bus.

It just started snowing. It’s supposed to all day — adding up to an inch or two. I’d prefer a foot or two but there is still time; winter just started two weeks ago.

My daughter just came down in a zombie state. Her head hurts so bad she can’t see. blah. blah. I’ve heard it all before. “I’m not going to school.” This girl had me in truancy court last year because of all of her “headaches” that would magically clear up during the 27 days she wasn’t feeling well. $10,000 in fines I was threatened with. Did she care? Not a bit and it’s easy to assume she’s trying to pull shit this year again.

“You’re going!” I snapped back.

Maybe her head does hurt, but her refusing to take her anti-depressants every other day isn’t helping her head (no pun intended). She’s going backwards, the boy is moving forward. Can’t they fucking get it together?

“You’re such a bitch!” she screamed as I threatened to punish her if she missed her bus. When my head hurts so bad that I think I’m dying I certainly can’t scream. I can barely talk.

Maybe I am a bitch but that’s the part of my personality that was missing for too long. In two years she’ll be 18, she can move out then. In the meantime it’ll suck being her. Unless she gets her shit together or enjoys not having a social life.

Yay, such a lovely start to the morning. Again, I can’t be surprised; I predicted this yesterday. It’s the cycle. One day good and the next bad. I do hope she feels better. I’m waiting now for her to come back to say she missed the bus.

*And right on cue, she walks back in. Of course she missed her bus.

She didn’t even attempt to get it. She was too busy cursing at me to run (or even walk) to it.. She took her medicine that I demanded she take and flopped on the couch. Drama becomes her. I guess she likes not having a phone and she won’t be watching any tv today or tonight either.

I don’t know what else to do. Drive her to school so the nurse calls me in an hour to come pick her up? She hasn’t missed days without actually being sick this year and having gone to the doctors for antibiotics. I can’t just say “Oh, okay you can stay home,” without a fight ever again though. There have been days that she had headaches then went and survived. It sucks for her when she isn’t well, but she made it this way.

I can guarantee that the boy will pull this one day this week, too. Or maybe he will wait until next week, but I’m thinking it will be this. They keep dibs on this stuff you know. Especially him. We have family therapy tonight so I’m going to nip it in the bud. Or try to at least.

These fucking kids. I was pretty rebellious as a kid but I don’t think I pulled an 1/8th of what they do. Paybacks are a bitch. Karma is a nightmare. I regret everything I ever did to piss my parents off.


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